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The 2024 Atlantic Hurricane Season Begins on June 1st and lasts until Nov 30th. NHC Outlooks resume on May 15th..
Days since last H. Landfall - US: Any 237 (Idalia) , Major: 237 (Idalia) Florida - Any: 237 (Idalia) Major: 237 (Idalia)
 


Off-Topic >> Comedy Shop

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Jamiewx
Storm Tracker


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Posts: 371
Loc: Orlando, Florida
Married Man's Harley
      #48354 - Fri Aug 19 2005 08:13 PM

The Married Man's Harley (The Mowercycle)


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"Climate is what you expect, weather is what you get"
- Robert A. Heinlein


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B.C.Francis
Storm Tracker


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Posts: 330
Loc: Indiatlantic Florida
Ugly People [Re: Jamiewx]
      #48408 - Sat Aug 20 2005 01:02 PM

Once there was a bus of 100 ugly people. The bus swerved off the road and they all died.
When they went to heaven God felt bad for them and gave them each one wish.
The first guy came up and said .." I wish I was handsome." So God made him handsome.
So next a women came up and said.." I wish I was beautiful." So god made her beautiful.
They all came up one by one wishing to be beautiful or handsome while one guy stood at the end of the line laughing hysterically.
When his turn finally comes, God say, " And what is your wish."
He replies," Pftt, make them all ugly again. "

Weatherchef


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B.C.Francis
Storm Tracker


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Posts: 330
Loc: Indiatlantic Florida
Two New Elements [Re: B.C.Francis]
      #52063 - Mon Aug 29 2005 01:43 PM

Element Name: WOMANIUM Symbol: WO

Atomic Weight:( don`t even go there )

Physical Properties: Generally soft and round in form. Boils at nothing and may freeze any time. Melts when handled properly. Very bitter if not used well.

Chemical Properties: Very active. Highly unstable. Possesses strong affinity with gold, silver and platinum, and precious stones. Violent when left alone. Able to absorb great amounts of exotic food. Turns slightly green when placed next to a better specimen

Usage: Highly ornamental.An extremely good catalyst for the dispersion of wealth. Probably the most powerful income reducing agent known.

Caution: Highly explosive in inexperienced hands.

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Element Name: MANIUM Symbol: XY
Atomic Weight: ( 190 +/- 50 )

Physical Properties: Solid at room temperature, but gets bent out of shape easily. Fairly dense and sometimes flaky. Difficult to find a pure sample.

Due to rust, aging samples are unable to conduct electricity as easily as young samples.

Chemical Properties: Attempts to bond with WO any chance it can get. Also tends to form strong bonds with itself. Becomes explosive when mixed with KD (Element : CHILDIUM ) for prolonged period of time. Neutralized by saturating with large amounts of alcohol.

Usage: Presently unknown. Possibly a good source of methane. Good samples are able to produce large quantities at room temperature.

Caution: In absense of WO, XY rapidly decomposes and begins to smell.


Enjoy.....Weatherchef


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